Monday, September 21, 2009

Richard Nixon's Nickname

Before telling this humdinger of a tale, I'd just like to warn you that it's, um, slightly blue in nature. Okay? Okay.

Spencer and I were outside this afternoon playing in the backyard. She was picking buttercups and I was watching her squeal in delight. My elderly next door neighbor was also outside enjoying the beautiful day underneath of her patio umbrella. She was talking on the phone and I couldn't help but hear her booming voice- my buttercups and her patio are right beside each other.
I'm helping Spencer make a bouquet of the flowers when I hear this from my 75 year old neighbor- "I only put store bought meat in my mouth, I don't put [insert Richard Nixon's nickname, otherwise known as a slang term for the male genitalia] in there."

A little old lady, just like this!

I don't think anyone would consider me a prude, I'm definitely not, but I think my eyes would have bulged out of my head if it were possible. I tried to reconcile what I just heard with the knowledge of who said it, my mind reeling- it's still reeling as I write this. I was so embarrassed that I had heard her, I know I turned eight shades of red, but at the same time, she had to know that we were there and could hear her!
My first instinct was to try and skulk away, whispering to Spencer that if she stopped picking flowers I'd give her some ice cream as soon as we got inside. I just wanted to escape as quickly as possible. Miraculously, she obliged and ran to the porch to await her Haagen Das vanilla treat. Spencer rarely does what I ask her to do the first time- she usually gauges how serious I am and then reacts accordingly- but today she listened. (Insert the Hallelujah Chorus)

The whole scene keeps popping back into mind, along with an involuntary shudder. I know that I didn't do anything wrong, but I feel like did. Although I am VERY grateful that Spencer wasn't paying attention to her, because she's turned into an excellent mimic, and that's the LAST thing I need her repeating over and over again! Can you imagine??!!
We don't have all that much interaction with this neighbor, but we see her every single day and usually say something "neighborly" to each other. Am I making too big a deal of this, because I've been known to do that before? I'm sure that I might have found it amusing had Spencer not been there, but she was there. And it was just yesterday that she ran around saying "damm it" after I said it when I stepped on one of her magnetic letters that she'd thrown on the floor. I'm pretty certain if she went around saying Richard Nixon's nickname, someone would call CPS.
Before the above events occurred, I did manage to take these super cute pictures of Spencer. I have the overwhelming need to end this post with them.

post signature


Mrs. Walk said...

First of all, that is both hilarious and horrifying. Second, someone recently told me that there's a trick they swear by (no pun intended) for when you accidentally say a word you shouldn't in front of an oh-so-absorbent child: immediately say the words "peanut butter." Apparently, this is a more fun thing to say, so usually the kid will forget the other word they just heard and repeat "peanut butter" instead. I haven't tested this myself, but I thought I'd pass along the tip!

Melissa said...

WOW!!! To think that an older lady would talk so degrading about herself. I look at my grandparents and they wouldn't even understand, coming from their generation and their upbringing. Thats terrible. Maybe you should avoid her all together so Spencer doesn't learn a whole new vocabulary... I'm totally kidding, try the peanut butter test if something comes up!! hee hee hee

Alaina @ Three Ladies and a Dad said...

First off, I love your blog!

Second, you won a set of Skinny Minis on my blog! Please contact me from the contact form on my blog. Congratulations!

Hayley said...

Aside from having Spencer in the vicinity- that's pretty funny. The sad part is, when I'm 80 and senile, that's probably exactly what I'll be like!

kbreints said...

So funny!! and those pictures are just adorable :)

KK said...

I always say when I am old, I will say whatever I want! You might want to keep small children from me at that time.

Lin Shijun said...

shijun 6.25
michael kors outlet
mont blanc legend
coach factory outlet
coach outlet
coach outlet online
louis vuitton outlet
cheap toms sale for kis
air jordan 11
concord 11s
coach outlet
louis vuitton purses
ray ban sunglass
hogan outlet
christian louboutin outlet
toms canada
jordan retro 11
ralph lauren outlet
celine bags
ray ban aviators
louis vuitton handbags
coach outlet store online
concord 11
louis vuitton outlet
louis vuitton handbags
michael kors
cheap jerseys wholesale
tod's outlet
kate spade
louis vuitton outlet
air jordans
gucci handbags
michael kors outlet
jordan 11 columbia
louis vuitton

mao qiuyun said...

tory burch outlet online
ray ban sunglasses
michael kors factory online,
michael kors outlet
pandora jewelry
oakley outlet
cheap nfl jerseys
coach outlet
cheap nhl jerseys
replica handbags
ray ban sunglasses
cheap oakley sunglasses
basketball shoes,basketball sneakers,lebron james shoes,sports shoes,kobe bryant shoes,kobe sneakers,nike basketball shoes,running shoes,mens sport shoes,nike shoes
asics shoes
green bay packers jerseys
louis vuitton handbags
babyliss pro
michael kors uk outlet
mcm handbags
tory burch outlet
the north face uk
giuseppe zanotti
tory burch outlet
michael kors outlet online
lebron shoes
chanel outlet
nike trainers
longchamp outlet
swarovski uk
oakley sunglasses wholesale,
hermes outlet
true religion jeans,
prada handbags
foamposite gold
timberland boots
cheap ray ban sunglasses

风骚达哥 said...

20150828 junda
nike cortez
christian louboutin
hermes bags
ray ban glasses
nike running shoes
ray bans
soccer jerseys wholesale
nike roshe run mens
basket ball shoes
adidas superstar
ralph lauren
fitflops outlet
nike air max 90
prada handbags
toms shoes outlet
cheap jerseys
kate spade handbags
ray ban sunglasses
timberland uk
coach outlet
ralph lauren uk
cheap oakley sunglasses
michael kors
nike store uk
michael kors outlet
ed hardy clothing
mcm handbags
black timberland boots
hollister clothing store
polo ralph lauren
oakley sunglasses outlet
toms outlet
tory burch shoes
ralph lauren homme
sac longchamp
christian louboutin outlet
nike blazer low
air force 1
nike blazer

sfsd said...

Coach Outlet Online,
Burberry Outlet Online,
Michael Kors Outlet Online,
Ralph Lauren Outlet Online,
Longchamp Outlet Online,
MCM Outlet Online,
Oakley Outlet Online,
Ugg Boots Sale,
Coach Outlet,
Burberry Outlet,
Toms Outlet Online,
Chanel Outlet Online,
Oakley Outlet,
Coach Handbags Outlet,
Michael Kors Handbags Outlet,
MCM Handbags Outlet,
Gucci Handbags Outlet,
Burberry Handbags Outlet,
Michael Kors Outlet,
Burberry Outlet,
Nike Outlet,
Ralph Lauren Outlet,
Ray Ban Outlet,
Nike Shoes Outlet,
Air Huarache UK,
Air Max Shoes Outlet,
Supra Shoes Outlet,
Toms Shoes Outlet,
Coach Bags Outlet,
Coach Factory Outlet,
Michael Kors USA,
Nike Air Huarache
ugg boots outlet
polo outlet online
Coach Online Outlet
Nike Outlet
polo outlet
Michael Kors Outlet Canada
MCM Backpack
Michael Kors Outlet
Gucci Outlet

chenlili said...

true religion sale
oakley sunglasses wholesale
michael kors outlet
michael kors handbags
coach factory
michael kors outlet
barbour uk
michael kors handbags
cheap ran bans
toms outlet store
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors handbags
louboutin femme pas cher
ray ban sunglasses
michael kors outlet online
michael kors bags
louis vuitton bags
ray ban uk
louis vuitton
adidas outlet
ray ban wayfarer
true religion outlet
coach outlet store online
coach factory outlet
jordan 6 rings
polo ralph lauren
toms shoes
ray ban sunglasses

Post a Comment